Jan. 1st, 2020 08:00 am
lea_hazel: The Little Mermaid (Default)
Drop me a line about anything here.
lea_hazel: Typewriter (Basic: Writing)
Shits about to get real with my [community profile] jukebox_fest assignment. Original fic real.

The 100

Apr. 17th, 2015 08:57 pm
lea_hazel: I am surrounded by tiny red hearts (Feel: Love)
Look, I'm sick and I have therapy and travel plans and money issues and chores, but I just came in here to say that The 100 is officially now the show I didn't think I deserved. Like, I must have done something right in a past life to have gotten this show.
lea_hazel: Kermit: OMG YAY *flail* (Feel: OMGYAY)
Dear [community profile] jukebox_fest gifter!

Read more... )

You are not obliged to hold up any part of this except the DNW part way at the beginning.

The 100

Apr. 14th, 2015 07:09 pm
lea_hazel: I am surrounded by tiny red hearts (Feel: Love)
This fucking show. I cannot.

I Live

Apr. 13th, 2015 06:20 pm
lea_hazel: The outlook is somewhat dismal (Feel: Crash and Burn)
Let today the thirteenth of April be forever commemorated as the day on which I was not vanquished by a migraine.


Apr. 6th, 2015 10:35 am
lea_hazel: Arthritis: It does the body bad (Health: Arthritis)
My head hurts because I didn't sleep enough (thanks Obama Skyrim) and my eyes hurt because I did an eye exam. Not an EOG, one of the ones with no electrodes. But still, like half an hour of flashing lights and my eyes tearing up. I want to rest my eyes, but I don't want to sleep because it'll prevent me from resetting my night sleep to a semi-reasonable manageable time-frame.

The problem is, literally every source of entertainment I use involves white light screens and eye strain. Goddamn.

For some reason, eye exams tend to put me in a bizarre frame of mind. Weird emotional stuff. )

Anyway, embodiment issues.

I have the whole week off and I was planning on doing some social stuff and whole hell of a lot of writing. I may twine a bit. I... also may write a meta piece about Skyrim. Which I would then post here, and not on Tumblr. I'm not gonna lock it, but I'd probably want it to be linked either selectively or not at all. The last thing I want is to open a meta essay with "rules of engagement" so to speak, but I'm fraught and my energy for conflict is nonexistent.

Anyway, Passover, yeah. Favorite holiday. Best time of year. Totally worth the lack of bread, and ~50% of my other favorite foods.

I'm gonna go lie down before I hurt myself.

A Game

Apr. 1st, 2015 10:12 pm
lea_hazel: The Little Mermaid (Default)
Let's play a game called, "How far back in my AO3 can I go before I hit a story that utterly appalls me?"
lea_hazel: The outlook is somewhat dismal (Feel: Crash and Burn)
So the doctor said, "I think it's probably migraines, so here, go see a neurologist." He mentioned that a neuro might possibly want to do x-rays or a CT. But I am kind of glad just to know that it sounds like migraines to someone other than myself.

On the other hand, I completely forgot to mention the cold/virus/something I had for half of last week.

I should write. I know that writing will make me feel better. I know I will feel accomplished. It will help my emotional balance and it will be fun. Good, productive-like fun. I just... need to kickstart it somehow.
lea_hazel: Don't make me look up from my book (Basic: Reading)
One of the baffling and endlessly fascinating phenomena in pop culture is how devoted fans can become, not to a show or book, but to the ideology presented within. Even if said ideology is vague or formulaic, to the point where the preoccupation is pretty clearly with the thing in itself (as opposed to its philosophical implications). People list their religion as "Jedi" all the time, and not just as an in-joke. Despite that the Jedi order stands for such ultra-specific ideas (TV Tropes link) as "justice is good and tyranny is bad".

At this point in my fannish life, it's become pretty clear to me that, whatever capacity I might have had as a kid, I can't take this attitude seriously at all. Maybe my approach is just too aggressively Doylist (Fanlore link). I automatically default to thinking, "Why do the creators want so badly for me to believe in this thing?" I can't quite take it at face value. Morally-grey works become hard to stomach... because they're almost never as "grey" as their creators think. Authors are constantly subtly (or unsubtly) nudging their readers towards a certain belief, or conviction, or POV.

It makes certain fandom discussions uncomfortably interesting. And it makes playing RPGs very interesting. Over something like three years in Dragon Age fandom, I have completely failed to become a Fereldan nationalist. And I've developed an outright hostility towards Andraste (the Jean d'Arc/lady Jesus prophet of the game's fictional church). Why? Because I can.

But that's a different issue altogether, I suppose. Whatever game-makers (and show-makers, and writers) expect of their audience usually has very specific cultural undertones. Sadly, these are undertones of which they are overwhelmingly unaware. Mostly they seem to think that the philosophical and cultural underpinnings of their work are universally applicable to the human experience. People who were raised in a Christian secular society seem to have a really hard time with the idea that Jews don't believe in Jesus.

But I don't believe in Jesus. Even if I believed in God, and practiced the religion of my parents and grandparents, I still wouldn't believe in Jesus. And because Jesus and Christianity are beyond pervasive in mass media popular culture... given a chance to do so, I'm going to choose not to believe in space Jesus.
lea_hazel: The Little Mermaid (Default)
The less said about the elections, the better. Suffice to say, Wednesday morning was rough, not just because of the inexplicable URT infection I've been nursing. I've decided the only cure is video game political assassinations. Plural, if possible.

Meanwhile, I'm keeping up with being sick. Drinking lots of orange juice and tea with honey. Sleeping a lot. Got a doctor's appointment, which will be extremely helpful because doctors can do a lot to treat (probably) viral infections. Making a conscious decision not to think about work until I have to. Also putting off thinking about contracts and deadlines and ugh.

I'm debating between making a post about Skyrim and making a post about family legends.
lea_hazel: Neuron cell (Basic: Science)
I swept the floor in both rooms (without going into weird fits about reaching lots of tiny corners. much). I cleaned the kitchen sink and the bathroom. I cleared lots of paperwork that needed clearing and paid utilities. I really want to mp the floor (rather, I really want the floor to be in a state of having been mopped) but I am tired.

Later I can also change the linen and probably cycle a color laundry. Oh, and I washed the dishes too but that's obvious because I needed to do t to clean the sink.

And I wrote.

Part of the reason for the hygiene frenzy is that lots of dust had gathered under my bed. Another part of the reason is cut for invertebrates )

I've only been wearing that skirt since I was about twenty three. I more than got its worth out of it. I just. I will never again have a skirt quite that perfect. Quietly mourning my pleated skirt.


Mar. 10th, 2015 07:30 pm
lea_hazel: Arthritis: It does the body bad (Health: Arthritis)
Still kind of crashed from yesterday, TBH.

Read more... )


Mar. 7th, 2015 10:50 pm
lea_hazel: Neuron cell (Science: Brains)
So this pretty much wraps up Purim. I nominally dressed up as Red Riding Hood but it's not terribly convincing because it's the sort of outfit I'd wear on an average summer day to work. I had some 70% fig liquor and should probably have had about half as much as I did. I did get plenty of snacks (pretzels, potato chips and popcorn) so I'm not really worried about headaches and the like. I am taking a water bottle and a granola bar to bed with me, though.

[community profile] purimgifts was awesome as ever and, par for the course, gifted me with a deluge of positive feedback far above what I can usually expect. Which is delightful.

I received three Root/Shaw fics for Person of Interest and they were charming and perfectly in-character, not to mention just the thing for a week with no episode: Chai and conversation (featuring Shaw and Persian cuisine), Polish (featuring Root and Halloween), and Day in the Life (which is kind of a meta summation of the Root/Shaw ship, in my eyes).

I wrote four fics. My gifts were a series of Agent Carter/Miss Fisher crossover bits, filed under How We Won the War. Then I wrote a rapid, last-minute treat: The Katabasis of Queen Esther, in which Esther and Vashti reenact Inanna's descent into the underworld. Also Tarot. I piled on some extra crack on top of that, too, because apparently that's how my brain plots on Saturday mornings.

Now i am strongly tempted to utilize my intoxication to write fic, but instead I will be an adult and go to bed early(ish). Because work tomorrow.


Mar. 6th, 2015 04:29 pm
lea_hazel: Kermit: OMG YAY *flail* (Feel: OMGYAY)
Celebrating the holiday by marathoning the fourth season of Once Upon a Time. And [community profile] purimgifts of course. I got a wonderful Root/Shaw gift which delights me to no end. I'm actually pretty pleased with the gifts I wrote, too, even though I wrote them under enormous stress and a massive time crunch. Work being super intense didn't help.

When I get home, I'll probably sink into writing angstless, stress-free smutlets.
lea_hazel: Don't make me look up from my book (Basic: Reading)
Looking back at all the years of my blog which were dominated almost completely by uni stuff and I can't help but thinking that I just sort of flushed all those years away. For nothing. For no good reason. A friend told me once that I would stop thinking (eventually) that my twenties were the decade I had to pay back for my teens. I really hope that's true.


Feb. 24th, 2015 09:35 pm
lea_hazel: Typewriter (Basic: Writing)
I've been doing some thinking this evening and here are my conclusions:

1. I hate my job.

2. I need a beta reader for Collar of the Damned.

Day Log

Feb. 21st, 2015 07:20 pm
lea_hazel: Neuron cell (Science: Brains)
Today I spent a lot of time reading in bed, replied to some comments on fic, posted/crossposted some fic, wiped down part of the kitchen counter, swept the living room floor, and wrote my words.

I also watched the first episode(s) of The Librarians, which a friend billed to me as "American Dr. Who, except with less of the stuff you hate (and I love)." That seems mostly accurate. Noah Wyle is aggressively channeling Matt Smith, which I'm okay with. Eccentric white dudes still take front and center, and they have that male-genius-female-caretaker act going on. But then again, they name it explicitly way at the start, which is interesting to me.

One of the fics I posted is one that I wrote over months and angsted over a lot. Also, it will probably be my last Dragon Age fic, at least for a while. Maybe a long while. The fandom cycle continues, but at least the disenchantment didn't culminate in a total disappearing act. In better fandom news, [community profile] purimgifts is going pretty well, if not as prompt and early as I'd've liked.

Some of that dust from sweeping got down my throat. Just means I need to sweep more diligently and not allow it to build up like that.


Feb. 9th, 2015 08:05 am
lea_hazel: The outlook is somewhat dismal (Feel: Crash and Burn)
Keep thinking, "I'm pretty sure I have a medical exam scheduled tomorrow, I better not be late, haha how funny would it be if it were today- OH FUCK" when you realize that it was scheduled for twenty minutes ago. Note to self: Monday and Tuesday are totally different days. Not the same. At all.


Feb. 1st, 2015 07:46 pm
lea_hazel: The outlook is somewhat dismal (Feel: Crash and Burn)
I was meant to print out this month's scripts last night, and then this morning. I came to print them now and the printer gives an alert that it's low on ink. Cyan ink. Come on, printer, you don't need specifically cyan ink to print a prescription. Fuck whoever decided that this thing will force me to buy ink I don't need instead of giving me the option to print in B&W.

And life stuff. )

In good news, I've been writing fic and it's fun and happy-making. Still in the total obsession (if not quite honeymoon) phase of Shiny New Fandom. Whenever I'm not playing or reading or writing... I'm thinking about playing or writing. My AO3 page is starting to gradually show the signs.


lea_hazel: The Little Mermaid (Default)

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