lea_hazel: The outlook is somewhat dismal (Feel: Crash and Burn)
lea_hazel ([personal profile] lea_hazel) wrote2014-10-19 01:49 pm

FML

Did a test for a job. Owe a phone call for another job. Looked up Open U and they had no useful information to provide, other than reminding me that I signed up for a group with no face-to-face instruction. Now I need to do lunch, but I've gotten to the place where I'm too hungry to eat, I have no appetite and there's nothing especially tempting in the house.

I keep fighting against the 'don't be spoiled, eat what's in the house' mode of thought because goddamn it, if I do that then I don't eat and that means it's not a preference, it's a need. I need to force my brain to accept the reality of needing food, and I can only do that with food that looks and smells appetizing. If I'd eaten two hours ago, a peanut butter sandwich or leftover pasta would probably have been fine. Right now there's no chance that's going down.

I just... I can't properly digest dairy the way I used to, but all my favorite foods are soaked in cheese. It's really hard to work up some sort of appetite for other stuff. I mean, I made a whole list, a menu and a shopping list, but because of circumstances and slipped planning... Bluh. I need to do a grocery shopping. Like a proper one, that ends with a house full of food.

Anyway I got the [community profile] femslashex in and it's... uh, in English. It has sentences and there are girl kisses and more than a thousand words. Technically it meets the qualifications for a fill. Whether it can exceed the base level requirements is beyond my capacity to speculate on, right now.

I am going to go eat a food.